It’s a strange feeling getting older. I must admit I have always felt old, in the kind of having lived many lifetimes and experienced personally the whole array of human emotions on a deep and penetrating level.
Some of these episodes I cannot consciously recollect however the associated feelings of those times are as fresh now as they possibly were then.
There are many places and situations that have occurred in my life which give me a distinct sense of deja vu. Sometimes it’s a visual flashback, sometimes on a different sensory level.
The point being, as I occasionally stop, turn around and look out at the landscape of my life prior to that, it seems to stretch out for an eternity.
Some memories I can clearly see, some are vague outlines partly lost in the mists of time. Some are seemingly lost altogether though may return unbidden at some pertinent synchronatic moment.
For me, life is very much like climbing a mountain. I become tired yet somehow stronger. Looking out at the journey I have so far travelled, there are times I have taken the wrong path and times when I have fallen and been injured. Also there are many moments of love, warmth and pure bliss. I feel that I have learnt much, just in this lifetime.
I find it difficult to predict what the path ahead has in store. One’s life can take many unforseen twists and turns. Whatever happens, whether seemingly good or bad, I realise will pass.
For as my journey up until now has proven, one cannot really judge at any one moment, that what occurs is either positive or negative.
What I do know is, I don’t regret any of what I have been through in the past as it has made me who I am now.
And the future? A true adventure for the taking. Endless possibilities and endless experiences lie in wait.
Despite my tiredness, I am eager to continue. Perhaps I will get to the summit one day? Now that would be something.
individuator 